Monday, March 23, 2009
God, I Am Stupid
"God, I Am Stupid"
by LeAnn Rimes
I know what you're thinking, "Wow, how could you be so stupid, LeAnn? You're on the heels of a slight comeback as one of the world's most adorable and lovable country-pop singers and you had an affair in public."
Well, I'm here to set the record straight. I'm not stupid. I just make really, really, really, really stupid mistakes. I mean, sure, maybe I shouldn't have been making out with my co-star when we weren't on set, and in a public, crowded restaurant in Hollywood. It's almost like I was so randy that I couldn't wait for the bedroom. We had to kiss at the table like we were 14-year-olds looking to get to second base at a Marie Calendar's because we have nowhere else to grope. Or a senior citizen couple that polite kisses after each bite. Looking back on things, I should've waited until we were out of the restaurant.
You know what? The more I think about it, the more I think that yes, I am incredibly, incredibly, incredibly...stupid.
Also, you know what else is really stupid? My shoes on the cover of this here book. And my face. It looks like I farted and I'm waiting for you to figure out it was me.